Writer's Block Anonymous

Ah, Don’t Worry Darling (2022), the movie with the grammatically incorrect title and more intriguing drama surrounding its making than in the film itself. I don’t know about you, but I’ve been waiting for this piece of cinema for a while. The marketing, the gorgeous trailer, the star-studded cast, but above all, I think we can agree Mr. Harry Styles himself pulled us in. In case you missed his incredibly moving line when describing Don’t Worry Darling, he said, “You know, my favorite thing about the movie is that it feels like a movie.” Wow, that’s some really thoughtful, clever stuff right there. I, too, love when a movie feels like a movie, so within that moment, I knew this film really would be something. So, with the excitement of a movie promised to feel like a movie, I ran down to the theaters this last Tuesday with my bestie, where we settled in for what we hoped would be the cinematic experience of the year.

Before we discuss the movie itself, I think it’s key to discuss more important matters: the real-life drama involved in producing such an A-list-involved film. Now, I don’t claim to really have any understanding of what was actually happening on the inside of this massive production, but I have a love for gossip, so I can at least tell you what I’ve heard. While the complicated drama is more confusing than the ending of the movie (you’ll understand what I mean once you’ve watched the film), Ms. Cosmopolitan Magizine herself gives a pretty comprehensive guide in her article “A Breakdown of the Seemingly Endless ‘Don’t Worry Darling’ Drama.” Now, while I love a good tidbit of juicy gossip, I am too lazy to read through the whole article, so if you want to learn more about any of the drama discussed or see more parts I missed, head on over to that article!

Okay, so I know that Harry Styles and Olivia Wilde were dating at some point and might still be dating now. Should we be having relationships between us employees and our higher-ups? Definitely not (yeah, I’m looking at you too, Mr. “Ex-Try Guys” Ned Fulmer), but Hollywood isn’t really known for following office rules, so we’ll move past that part. This leads us to the alleged drama between Florence Pugh and Olivia Wilde. Apparently, people started noticing this possible conflict when Olivia Wilde posted some Don’t Worry Darling marketing on her Instagram (I think it focused on Pugh). In contrast, Florence Pugh only posted about the other project she’s in right now. Oh, Instagram, we can always count on you to help cause unnecessary drama, and we love you for that. Later, I saw articles, as well as it is mentioned in the Cosmopolitan article, that Pugh and Wilde had some huge screaming match at some point though who knows what it was about. I will say I am impressed by how actors can hate each other in real life but act all friendly in a movie, like Wilde and Pugh, who are friends in the story. I simply could never. My last bit of drama, arguably the most confusing headline of them all, is the accusation that Harry Styles spit on Chris Pine??? Yeah, I also don’t understand that one at all. If it’s true, then I worry our Harry is pulling a Mel Gibson way too early in his career. Come on, Harry, you need to play nice with the other actors for now.

If all this real-life drama is later revealed as a marketing ploy, it totally worked because I knew I had to see the film that had caused so many headlines! With the release date being September 23rd, by the time I made it to the theaters, the verdict had already come out that this movie was not what everyone hoped it would be. That being said, after seeing Rotten Tomatoes give Paul Blart: Mall Cop only a score of 34%, I have lost all trust in critics’ opinions, so the poor reviews did not deter me. In this case, Rotten Tomatoes, you were actually on the ball, so there’s some credit to you, but you still gave it more than Paul Blart: Mall Cop with a 38% score, so you aren’t off the hook. 

So, basically, trying not to give any spoilers, the plot is very much the Stepford Wives reimagined. Everything seems perfect at first, but there is more than meets the eye (like in a bad way). Don’t put my head on a spike because you could tell all of that from just watching the trailer, so there are NO spoilers here. One thing right off the bat that I did not like was the lack of build-up. I would say most of the movie feels like it’s stuck in the climax portion of the plot. From the beginning, Florence Pugh’s character starts to experience less-than-perfect dreams and visions that, what feels like too soon, shatter her belief that she is living in the sanctuary she once thought. Of course, this sudden weirdness seems to have a real lack of cause, so you sit there wondering what set this off other than because the movie needs to plot. This is not the only plot hole, as the ending honestly causes way more discrepancies throughout the entire film than actually wrapping up the story as one should. The “twist,” in M. Night Shyamalan-esque fashion, is not particularly shocking, considering you keep asking yourself why a woman like Pugh’s character would be in a place like this. Is that too much of a spoiler? I don’t know, but I guess you can tell me if I ruined it once you see the movie. This ending also simply causes more problems with the overall script. I can’t wait until five years from now when I can finally talk about all the plot holes and confusion in depth without fear of spoilers. But, alas, this movie is still way too new for me to say more, so it’s best we move on!

I am sorry if this review disappointed you by confirming the critics’ verdicts. I know many people were excited for this movie because they were riding the high expectations for Olivia Wilde after her debut movie Booksmart. I, for one, thought that movie was also terrible, so I didn’t come in expecting much from her, but I was hoping Harry would surprise us with being a fantastic actor. Let’s just say that it’s probably a good thing he was dating the director, and I’m glad that he has his talent for singing to continue to bank on. I’m not sure I would make a full-blown switch to acting quite yet, Harry, my boy! That being said, you can tell he tried his best, and that’s really what counts, at least at this blog; it does. I will caution all of you who came explicitly for our collective boyfriend that there is a jumpscare of Harry looking scraggily AF. That boy will never be the same in my eyes. You have been warned!

Before I leave you to decide if you want to spend way too much on a movie ticket to see if all the slander is true, I want to dedicate this time to talking about Florence Pugh and her fantastic acting. Everyone says she is this movie’s light, and I wholeheartedly agree with that. I have actually never seen her act in anything before, so I was even more impressed than those of you who already know what a gem she is from her other parts in Midsommer and Little Women. Even if the plot is a mess and the ending eye-roll worthy, Florence Pugh is an acting queen and will have you rooting for her in a movie full of hateable characters. In Pugh we trust, so, honestly, her presence in the movie might just be enough to see the film. She looks like a goddess in every scene and slays the acting game hardcore; need I say more? 

Alright, well, there you have it. Go for Florence Pugh if you really feel the need to experience this film yourself. Of course, I know many of you Stylers will also be there. One last warning to you bunch, after seeing this movie, I can safely say no matter how downhill Harry’s career goes, we will never catch him on Dancing With the Stars. You will learn why very soon, but, hey, just focus on his gorgeous hair, and everything will be okay.

P.S. Do not watch this movie with your parents if you want to avoid some very awkward moments. Thank me later!

Status: It definitely feels like a movie, but is that enough?

Kisses,

Elle